ENOUGH TO TRY THE PATIENCE OF SAINT. . . . (part two)

“Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else.” - - Will Rogers

This thought continually occurs to me as a write about my youngest daughter Aleita’ s behavior. I keep getting emails and comments from several of you, letting me know how funny you think her behavior is, and that you find these stories about her really amusing. All I can say is that you think it is funny because you are not me. But I digress. For those of you who read yesterday’s entry, I imagine you are coming back today in eager anticipation of my follow up to Aleita’ s shenanigans with the babysitter. For those of you who didn’t read yesterday’s entry, you should probably start there, as today’s blog is a continuation of yesterday: http://paw-pawpatch.blogspot.com/2008/09/enough-to-try-patience-of-saint.html

OK –so even after Aleita decided to strip naked and run around the house instead of take a nap, our babysitter, Ashley, still bravely decided to come back for round two the following week. Punctual as usual, she showed up right on time at 9AM. Aleita had been properly punished for her craziness the Saturday prior, and she, Chris and I had a “come to Jesus” meeting right before we left for the game in which I hoped we instilled the fear of God into her. Apparently this child just ain’t that God-fearin’.

Chris called home just after half time to see how things were going. At that point, Ashley reported that things were going pretty well - - the only trouble being that Aleita was throwing fits when she didn’t win one of the games they were playing. I had no help for her on that one, because she does the exact same thing for us. In general, I have found that most four year olds aren’t what you would refer to as “good sports.” They don’t play a game because it is fun necessarily, they play a game because they want to be the WINNER. When they don’t win, they get very upset. I think Maggie was about six before she was able to not pout when she lost a game. Overall, if fit-throwing for losing a game was the biggest problem she had encountered, I thought we were doing pretty well. Ha. The fat lady hadn’t sung yet.

Even though we had talked AT LENGTH with Aleita that she was going to lay down and take a nap, she decided she would again forego one. The clothes did stay on, which is a bonus. Ashley said that she and Maggie played together in her room instead, which was fine because at least they weren’t causing trouble. As the afternoon went on, however, things started to erode somewhat. Maggie and Aleita convinced Ashley that we allowed them to have chips for a snack, so between the two of them, they consumed half a bag of cheesy puffs and some Doritoes as well. Aleita then took it upon herself to feed the dogs mid-afternoon. Dandy, our puppy, only gets half a scoop full of food at each feeding, but apparently she was feeling generous, so she gave him a full one. She also fed Dempsey as well. I, of course, didn’t realize this until Maggie brought it to my attention about two minutes after I fed the dogs again that afternoon.

The real kicker was the call we received about fifteen minutes before we arrived home. In an effort to get them out of the house and active, Ashley got their bubbles out and let them play out in the yard. A harmless activity, right? Well, almost. At some point, Ashley went back inside the house to get something and looked out the large picture window in the living room, just in time to see Aleita crouched behind the tree…but instead of BLOWING bubbles, she was DRINKING her bubbles. Yep – the whole container. (I would think they would taste awful too, but she seems to have an certain affinity for bathwater as well, so go figure.) Freaked out, Ashley called her mom, then called us. We assured her we were almost home and would soon be able to put the brakes on the crazy train for her.

We had reserved Ashley for another 9AM game in October, but I am going to call her and let her off the hook and I will probably just stay home with the kids. I don’t think I can stomach that feeling of dread in my stomach of wondering and worrying all day what mischief Aleita will have dreamed up in our absence. Would I come back to find the dogs shaved, or perhaps wearing my makeup? Would she decide to try to bungee jump from the porch roof? Would she take her trike out of the garage and go tooling around the town? I just couldn’t stomach the anxiety all day.

So for those of you who have already been there and done that, have a good laugh. For my friends and family who have children yet to reach this precious point in their lives, try not to chuckle too much. Your time may well be coming.

AFTERNOON COCKTAIL, ANYONE?